WEBVTT 00:00:00.280 --> 00:00:02.740 Hey, I'm going to invite you to Genesis chapter 24 together. 00:00:03.520 --> 00:00:05.480 Genesis chapter 24 together. 00:00:05.500 --> 00:00:11.350 And we are about to engage in the longest chapter in the book of Genesis 67 verses. 00:00:11.520 --> 00:00:11.900 All right. 00:00:12.080 --> 00:00:15.780 And I want you to know offhand, I am not reading all 67 verses. 00:00:16.620 --> 00:00:18.070 We're going to look at the first 20 verses. 00:00:18.800 --> 00:00:20.700 We're going to look at the last 5 or 6 verses. 00:00:21.380 --> 00:00:23.880 And in the in between, you're going to have to read that on your own. 00:00:23.940 --> 00:00:24.000 All right. 00:00:24.060 --> 00:00:26.320 I'll tell you the idea of what the in-between is about. 00:00:26.380 --> 00:00:30.360 But just know if you're a fan of nose rings, verse 47 is your verse. 00:00:30.360 --> 00:00:30.940 All right. 00:00:30.940 --> 00:00:35.200 So Genesis 24 is a great chapter of the Bible. 00:00:35.440 --> 00:00:37.880 And it's dealing with the idea of marriage. 00:00:37.920 --> 00:00:38.040 Right. 00:00:38.040 --> 00:00:39.620 So last week we talked about death. 00:00:39.800 --> 00:00:41.550 And today we're going to be talking more about life. 00:00:41.960 --> 00:00:48.090 And we're going to look at Isaac finding his mate, his spouse Rebecca, and the idea of marriage. 00:00:48.260 --> 00:00:48.440 Right. 00:00:48.500 --> 00:00:55.720 And so today specifically, we're going to we're going to look at what characteristics, three characteristics should you be looking for when you're seeking a mate. 00:00:55.840 --> 00:01:02.860 And I know for some of you, as soon as you hear a title like that, you're like, I'm already married or I'm cooked and done right, like wherever you're at in life, you might 00:01:02.860 --> 00:01:03.310 be looking. 00:01:03.420 --> 00:01:05.160 I'm not looking for a mate. 00:01:05.160 --> 00:01:05.860 I've got a mate. 00:01:05.860 --> 00:01:05.980 Right. 00:01:05.980 --> 00:01:08.760 Like, so what is the title like this have to do with you? 00:01:08.760 --> 00:01:10.690 Well, I would say a few things. 00:01:11.060 --> 00:01:15.600 One is if you've got a child, right, they they're going to be making a decision. 00:01:15.600 --> 00:01:18.460 That decision can impact generations starting with your family right now. 00:01:18.960 --> 00:01:21.930 So learning learning from this text could be important. 00:01:21.960 --> 00:01:26.750 If you're looking obviously looking for someone you maybe long to be married, it's an important title. 00:01:27.420 --> 00:01:33.000 if you know someone that's about to be married or might be looking for someone, you can encourage their lives through this, right? 00:01:33.000 --> 00:01:34.810 Or share this sermon with them, whatever. 00:01:34.980 --> 00:01:36.580 Or get this. 00:01:36.580 --> 00:01:44.110 When we look at the three characteristics that to seek after in a marital relationship or for someone that you could potentially marry, 00:01:44.740 --> 00:01:47.860 we're going to be talking about characteristics that are just healthy in general. 00:01:47.940 --> 00:01:49.820 It doesn't matter if you get married or not. 00:01:49.820 --> 00:01:51.440 These are just healthy characteristics. 00:01:52.460 --> 00:01:59.020 And for those that find themselves married today, these are characteristics that you can continue to go back and sharpen yourself on. 00:01:59.060 --> 00:02:05.360 This helps improve your relationship by challenging yourself and the kind of person that you are. 00:02:05.360 --> 00:02:12.440 So even though the title, you may not feel like specifically relevant to where you are in life, it definitely can apply to all of us, no matter where 00:02:12.440 --> 00:02:13.070 we are. 00:02:13.300 --> 00:02:20.360 And when you think about Genesis 24 being the longest chapter dealing with Isaac finding Rebecca, right, you may ask yourself, 00:02:20.360 --> 00:02:23.660 why is this the longest chapter out of all the chapters in Genesis? 00:02:23.980 --> 00:02:26.280 Why is this one the longest chapter like? 00:02:26.280 --> 00:02:31.580 There is some crazy things in Genesis that I think maybe they can take a little bit more to explain to us. 00:02:31.760 --> 00:02:37.640 Like who in the world are the sons of God and the daughters of men, that if you were there for that could be all sorts of different things there. 00:02:37.720 --> 00:02:39.320 Theologians have marveled over that for years. 00:02:39.340 --> 00:02:46.780 When you just get a few verses on that or like worldwide floods, like, you got the Noah Flood, how many you could certainly that might 00:02:46.780 --> 00:02:51.100 take, I don't know, a lot of chapters or how about just creation of everything. 00:02:51.320 --> 00:02:51.880 Right. 00:02:51.960 --> 00:02:56.480 But the longest chapter is the idea of marriage and why? 00:02:57.240 --> 00:03:00.260 Well, let me give you just a thought regarding that. 00:03:00.480 --> 00:03:07.520 I think as a, as a person, the two most important questions that you can ask and answer in 00:03:07.520 --> 00:03:08.060 your life. 00:03:09.460 --> 00:03:10.280 Who is your God? 00:03:12.160 --> 00:03:13.040 And who will you marry? 00:03:13.740 --> 00:03:16.300 Now, obviously the second one is only if you do get married. 00:03:16.300 --> 00:03:16.960 Right? 00:03:17.060 --> 00:03:19.780 But the two most important questions I think you can answer in your life. 00:03:20.040 --> 00:03:21.780 Who is your God and who are you? 00:03:21.840 --> 00:03:24.410 Marry because what you worship you will ultimately become. 00:03:25.260 --> 00:03:29.700 I think there's some people in life that they profess to follow a particular god. 00:03:29.820 --> 00:03:33.740 But then when you look at their life, you're like, you may say that, but that's not your God. 00:03:33.740 --> 00:03:37.100 The evidence of your life is demonstrated by what you're doing, right? 00:03:37.140 --> 00:03:42.380 And you may verbally give praise to a God, but you're demonstrating what you really worship by what you do. 00:03:43.000 --> 00:03:44.310 And so who is your God? 00:03:44.480 --> 00:03:46.960 One of the most important defining questions of who you are. 00:03:47.140 --> 00:03:49.960 Because who you are is determined by whose you are. 00:03:50.300 --> 00:03:51.550 You're made as a worship being. 00:03:51.620 --> 00:03:54.840 You will worship something to find your worth and value in this world. 00:03:55.060 --> 00:03:55.680 What is your purpose? 00:03:56.000 --> 00:03:57.220 It's based on what you worship. 00:03:57.740 --> 00:03:58.340 Who is your God? 00:03:58.400 --> 00:04:00.590 Second most important question who will you marry? 00:04:00.820 --> 00:04:06.470 When you think about those two the questions put together who is your God that matters for eternity? 00:04:06.640 --> 00:04:07.180 And who will you? 00:04:07.240 --> 00:04:09.260 Who will you marry that impacts generations? 00:04:10.560 --> 00:04:11.420 Both of those. 00:04:11.540 --> 00:04:18.680 Those questions have paramount significance in how you choose to respond to them and live those 00:04:18.680 --> 00:04:19.260 out. 00:04:20.140 --> 00:04:22.160 So how do you find that spouse? 00:04:22.160 --> 00:04:24.100 Three things to look for when seeking a spouse. 00:04:24.100 --> 00:04:28.020 How do you find that right spouse, that one that God has for you? 00:04:28.120 --> 00:04:34.860 Well, can I just start off by saying to you as we dive into this text, there is no such thing as a soulmate, all right? 00:04:34.880 --> 00:04:41.280 And I know, like, we want to romanticize those things in the movies, and you want to find that person that you connect to. 00:04:41.280 --> 00:04:43.040 You really care and love one another. 00:04:43.100 --> 00:04:44.380 I think that's important. 00:04:44.780 --> 00:04:46.740 But there's no biblical basis for a soulmate. 00:04:46.800 --> 00:04:48.950 The Bible does tell us that two become one flesh. 00:04:49.260 --> 00:04:56.320 So you want to certainly develop in the beauty of a relationship, walking in one mind together for the purpose of what God wants to accomplish through you and 00:04:56.320 --> 00:04:57.440 in you like that. 00:04:57.540 --> 00:04:58.540 That certainly is good. 00:04:58.660 --> 00:05:00.220 But there's no such thing as a soulmate. 00:05:00.220 --> 00:05:00.860 And let me tell you why. 00:05:01.860 --> 00:05:05.030 It's because you're sinful and they're sinful. 00:05:05.260 --> 00:05:10.240 And when you get two sinners under the same roof, it's not, it's messy sometimes. 00:05:10.540 --> 00:05:10.860 Right? 00:05:10.880 --> 00:05:16.250 There are things that in a marital relationship, God created marriage as a gift, and it's intended to be a blessing. 00:05:17.020 --> 00:05:23.380 And through the health of a home, it can bless a society and not just a society generations to come. 00:05:23.540 --> 00:05:24.940 So you certainly want the health of that relationship. 00:05:24.980 --> 00:05:32.000 But it's also important to recognize that just because that's what you want isn't what you always get, that all great things require effort and 00:05:32.000 --> 00:05:33.000 all great things. 00:05:33.140 --> 00:05:36.240 There's tension that is often involved. 00:05:36.240 --> 00:05:38.060 Great things work that way. 00:05:38.160 --> 00:05:41.830 And marriage in being a gift, one of the greatest gifts of marriage. 00:05:42.280 --> 00:05:49.280 It's a it's an incredible refiner to your own soul, because we all think we're pretty great when we're doing 00:05:49.280 --> 00:05:50.240 life solo. 00:05:50.300 --> 00:05:50.780 Right? 00:05:50.780 --> 00:05:51.990 Like, not that you're perfect. 00:05:52.020 --> 00:05:55.510 Even then you see your shortcomings, but it tends to be. 00:05:55.540 --> 00:06:02.560 You might overestimate how patient, loving and gentle you might be until you get under a roof with 00:06:02.560 --> 00:06:10.160 someone else 24 hours a day, seven days a week, and all of a sudden you discover, I may not be quite as patient as I thought I was, right? 00:06:10.160 --> 00:06:12.210 Especially when kids come into the picture. 00:06:12.260 --> 00:06:16.620 I'm not always as loving as I thought I could be, and I don't always look as great as when they see me. 00:06:16.620 --> 00:06:19.600 When I walk out of the house, like there is some. 00:06:19.640 --> 00:06:21.660 There's something hidden under here. 00:06:21.760 --> 00:06:24.200 But marriage has this way of drawing it out of you. 00:06:24.240 --> 00:06:27.600 And there's a way that you can respond to that that's healthy in a way that's unhealthy. 00:06:27.980 --> 00:06:29.520 Unhealthy way is you point and blame. 00:06:29.520 --> 00:06:30.140 It's their fault. 00:06:30.460 --> 00:06:36.660 The healthy way is you begin to realize when there's tension boiling up that is identifying something in you that needs worked on. 00:06:36.940 --> 00:06:41.860 And I know in marriage it's, rarely 5050 when something bad happens. 00:06:42.020 --> 00:06:46.050 But there's always there's always responsibility that we can take. 00:06:46.560 --> 00:06:53.740 And that marital relationship has this sweet way in the Lord of helping us understand where our own shortcomings might 00:06:53.740 --> 00:06:54.640 be. 00:06:55.320 --> 00:06:58.440 And so there's no such thing as a, as a soulmate. 00:06:58.880 --> 00:07:01.050 But marriage is also an incredible gift and blessing. 00:07:01.940 --> 00:07:09.060 And in making that decision is important because quite honestly, sometimes it's better to be single and happy than 00:07:09.060 --> 00:07:10.920 married and miserable, right? 00:07:10.920 --> 00:07:17.400 Like you, when you make that kind of a decision, it's a it's a, it could be decades of a decision. 00:07:17.760 --> 00:07:19.230 You want to make that decision wisely. 00:07:20.800 --> 00:07:25.320 And looking at a text like this, 67 verses, there are so many things I could point out. 00:07:25.620 --> 00:07:32.880 There are a lot of things in this text that we could infer about the example of Isaac and Rebecca in what helps 00:07:32.880 --> 00:07:34.940 set the precedent for a healthy marriage. 00:07:34.940 --> 00:07:35.500 Like what? 00:07:35.660 --> 00:07:36.960 How is that foundation established? 00:07:37.980 --> 00:07:42.020 I mean, in Isaac, Isaac is walking with the Lord before he gets married. 00:07:42.300 --> 00:07:45.320 Isaac has a career to provide for his family. 00:07:45.860 --> 00:07:50.530 He doesn't cohabitate with his future spouse before they're married. 00:07:50.540 --> 00:07:54.830 He marries someone that he can share his faith with, that they can desire to walk with the Lord together. 00:07:55.720 --> 00:07:58.880 Isaac honors Rebecca just as a person. 00:07:59.240 --> 00:08:06.610 Meaning he's not just he's not interested in what he gets from her, but rather he honors and acknowledges the beauty of who she is. 00:08:06.960 --> 00:08:11.360 You'll see that at the very end of Genesis chapter 24. 00:08:11.640 --> 00:08:17.630 And then Isaac, he sees love as more than a feeling, but rather it's a decision of the will. 00:08:18.180 --> 00:08:20.080 I think that's incredibly important for our culture. 00:08:20.160 --> 00:08:27.280 Love has become such a junk drawer word that we more define it as an infatuation in the way that we feel, than a decision 00:08:27.280 --> 00:08:30.080 of the will and how you want to give your life. 00:08:30.500 --> 00:08:35.780 I mean, the biblical word for love is agape, unconditional, sacrificial love. 00:08:35.880 --> 00:08:41.340 And when First Corinthians 13 describes that, it says, love never fails. 00:08:41.720 --> 00:08:47.580 So it's a complete dedication of who you are to help someone else become who God has called them to be. 00:08:47.640 --> 00:08:49.800 It's surrendering your life for their well-being. 00:08:50.140 --> 00:08:53.750 And when two people do that together, it creates an incredible relationship. 00:08:54.720 --> 00:08:58.040 Always putting one another before their own interests to bless one another. 00:08:58.040 --> 00:09:02.360 That they may become together what God has called them to be. 00:09:02.660 --> 00:09:09.800 But as you look at this text, as you look at these this passage, we're going to look at three direct points that this 00:09:09.800 --> 00:09:11.020 passage talks about. 00:09:11.100 --> 00:09:13.270 For those that may be seeking a spouse. 00:09:13.280 --> 00:09:21.100 And as you look at these characteristics again this is healthy characteristics that apply really to all of us in all walks of life, but as magnified in 00:09:21.100 --> 00:09:22.180 the marital relationship. 00:09:22.720 --> 00:09:29.740 And as you look at this text, I think it's important to, in these first couple of verses to establish the fact that not every family 00:09:29.740 --> 00:09:31.780 that you come from is perfect. 00:09:32.400 --> 00:09:35.880 In fact, some are crazy and you may think of your own. 00:09:36.100 --> 00:09:38.780 Yeah, we got some good and some crazy in our in our family. 00:09:39.180 --> 00:09:41.380 And the same thing is true in Genesis 24. 00:09:41.380 --> 00:09:42.660 It starts off verse one. 00:09:42.660 --> 00:09:43.360 It looks great. 00:09:43.440 --> 00:09:44.560 Verse two, it gets weird. 00:09:44.560 --> 00:09:45.060 Look at this. 00:09:45.360 --> 00:09:48.760 Genesis one, chapter 24, verse one and two. 00:09:48.760 --> 00:09:50.500 And we can probably retitle this. 00:09:50.600 --> 00:09:53.500 How do you seek a mate when your family might be a little crazy? 00:09:53.740 --> 00:09:55.140 That's that might be a better fit. 00:09:55.560 --> 00:09:59.420 But verse one now Abraham was old, well advanced in years. 00:09:59.420 --> 00:10:00.050 And look at this. 00:10:00.180 --> 00:10:02.770 And the Lord had blessed Abraham in all things. 00:10:03.460 --> 00:10:09.510 And I hope when I'm like 170 like Abraham is, or really old like he is in this passage, I don't want to plan. 00:10:09.640 --> 00:10:10.480 I don't plan to live that. 00:10:10.660 --> 00:10:11.370 I don't want to live that long. 00:10:11.840 --> 00:10:19.460 But however long I live that I'll live the kind of life that the Lord he blesses, 00:10:19.820 --> 00:10:20.020 right? 00:10:20.560 --> 00:10:27.560 And it's not to say like, I'm not out of God's blessing now, that just being a follower of Jesus, I experienced the 00:10:27.560 --> 00:10:32.160 blessing of what it is to know Christ and to walk with Christ, the fullness of blessing. 00:10:32.160 --> 00:10:34.980 It tells us in Ephesians, and I have in the Lord. 00:10:35.720 --> 00:10:39.040 But I also want to walk in such a way that I experience that right. 00:10:40.320 --> 00:10:45.120 And so my life surrendered to him, gives me that platform to experience the hand of his blessing. 00:10:45.120 --> 00:10:46.040 And Abraham has done that. 00:10:46.040 --> 00:10:47.260 What a what a beautiful goal. 00:10:47.300 --> 00:10:48.980 And then and then it gets weird, right? 00:10:48.980 --> 00:10:49.650 Here it is, verse two. 00:10:50.240 --> 00:10:56.150 And Abraham said to his servant, the oldest of his household, who had charge of all that he had, and this is probably Eliezer. 00:10:57.140 --> 00:10:59.470 And he says this, who is in charge of all that he had? 00:10:59.740 --> 00:11:01.720 Put your hand under my thigh. 00:11:01.860 --> 00:11:02.120 Right. 00:11:02.120 --> 00:11:05.160 And you see in verse nine and ten, Eliezer does this. 00:11:05.160 --> 00:11:07.860 So this is apparently customary in this day. 00:11:07.940 --> 00:11:09.770 But I never want to be in this kind of situation. 00:11:10.080 --> 00:11:10.480 Right. 00:11:10.480 --> 00:11:13.920 I would say to my future spouse, what kind of family am I marrying to? 00:11:14.120 --> 00:11:16.670 This is this is bizarre how you guys communicate. 00:11:16.740 --> 00:11:17.740 Does this happen all the time? 00:11:17.980 --> 00:11:25.300 Could you I mean, if I were another servant in Abraham's household and I'm like, Abraham's walking around with his leg out again. 00:11:25.940 --> 00:11:30.800 Like I'm just like, okay, Eliezer, let's just shut them in and do their thing, and I'm just going to move on. 00:11:30.800 --> 00:11:32.040 I'm not touching that hairy leg. 00:11:32.040 --> 00:11:32.140 Right? 00:11:32.140 --> 00:11:33.880 Like, this is weird. 00:11:34.000 --> 00:11:35.840 And this is what happens in this passage. 00:11:35.900 --> 00:11:43.040 But then verse three, and Abraham says, why that I may make your make you swear by the Lord, the God 00:11:43.040 --> 00:11:50.140 of heaven and God of the earth, that you will not take a wife for my son from the daughters of the Canaanite, among whom I 00:11:50.140 --> 00:11:57.810 dwell, but will go to my country and to my kindred, and take a wife for my son Isaac. 00:11:58.800 --> 00:12:05.980 So dealing with this thigh thing I get when I read, ancient documents, I could be dealing with 00:12:05.980 --> 00:12:13.260 a culture and customs that are foreign to my experience, and to best appreciate that, I need to understand what's happening to the people group 00:12:13.260 --> 00:12:15.430 at the time and place that this is existing. 00:12:15.920 --> 00:12:18.840 And so just reading through some commentaries, they explain this. 00:12:18.920 --> 00:12:20.960 This is what one commentary said in just a sentence. 00:12:21.620 --> 00:12:29.180 He said the thigh indicates the procreative power and heritage of the patriarchs position as 00:12:29.180 --> 00:12:31.260 the source of the family. 00:12:31.320 --> 00:12:31.780 Right. 00:12:32.000 --> 00:12:35.320 This is my position as the source of the family. 00:12:35.320 --> 00:12:35.980 Grab that. 00:12:35.980 --> 00:12:36.540 That's what they say. 00:12:36.840 --> 00:12:40.140 And which, reading that commentary, it's good to know that. 00:12:40.140 --> 00:12:41.180 But my question is still is. 00:12:41.180 --> 00:12:41.720 But why? 00:12:41.720 --> 00:12:43.380 Because you can just say that, right? 00:12:43.380 --> 00:12:50.000 You can just said to his servant as the source of the position to my family, he could have just verbally said that. 00:12:50.040 --> 00:12:52.200 So I just chalked it up to, I don't get it. 00:12:52.300 --> 00:12:53.980 I don't get why this is necessary. 00:12:54.640 --> 00:12:57.100 But in their culture and custom, this is what they did. 00:12:57.420 --> 00:13:04.560 And perhaps when reading this passage, you begin to realize that this isn't real common, that this 00:13:04.560 --> 00:13:05.950 is actually a rare occurrence. 00:13:06.880 --> 00:13:11.420 And when it does happen, it grabs even the people in that culture. 00:13:11.420 --> 00:13:16.420 Sure it grabs their attention to the significance of what's about to take place. 00:13:17.200 --> 00:13:24.680 And, being able to see this culture or not, it should say to you the significance of what's about to take place, 00:13:25.180 --> 00:13:32.460 how important that relationship is when you seek a spouse and Abraham is showing 00:13:32.460 --> 00:13:34.060 his concern for his son. 00:13:34.840 --> 00:13:37.440 So three things to look for when seeking a spouse. 00:13:37.440 --> 00:13:42.900 This leads us to point number one look for wise counsel. 00:13:44.400 --> 00:13:45.980 Look for wise counsel. 00:13:47.460 --> 00:13:52.520 This is a characteristic that is true for really all things. 00:13:53.520 --> 00:14:00.580 You want to be able to be in a position in life where people can speak into your life, especially when you know there are people that are 00:14:00.580 --> 00:14:04.980 for you, that desire God's best for you and will be honest with you. 00:14:05.980 --> 00:14:06.380 Right? 00:14:06.420 --> 00:14:10.700 This is not like your best friend whose biggest decision of the day is going to be. 00:14:10.700 --> 00:14:12.540 Should I watch the Kardashians or The Bachelor? 00:14:12.780 --> 00:14:12.880 Right? 00:14:12.920 --> 00:14:14.340 That's when it comes to marital relationship. 00:14:14.900 --> 00:14:22.060 That's not like the top of the pecking order that you probably need to be seeking that wise counsel from, but rather maybe look for someone 00:14:22.060 --> 00:14:26.820 who, in their own marriage, demonstrates the goodness and sweetness of the Lord. 00:14:27.600 --> 00:14:33.940 And maybe someone that's got years of experience in that, and you've come to appreciate that and maybe just seeking from them. 00:14:34.040 --> 00:14:41.040 What does it take to get where you are, knowing it's not always perfect and likely in every relationship there's some sort of tension and conflict to 00:14:41.040 --> 00:14:41.680 work through. 00:14:42.460 --> 00:14:48.240 But if you carry that kind of agape love for one another, what does it what does it take like seek wise counsel. 00:14:49.120 --> 00:14:50.580 Important no matter where you are in life? 00:14:50.580 --> 00:14:57.800 In fact, if you're in any kind of position at all, where you're hiding and you're trying to keep something secret and you don't want people to know, it reveals 00:14:57.800 --> 00:14:58.900 a position of shame. 00:14:58.940 --> 00:15:00.110 And it just kind of asks you the question. 00:15:00.300 --> 00:15:03.240 Or you should ask the question, why am I responding this way? 00:15:03.760 --> 00:15:04.000 Right? 00:15:04.000 --> 00:15:08.000 I mean, there are some things that are just good to not blare to everyone, right? 00:15:08.580 --> 00:15:15.260 But you need to have people that are comfortable to speak truth into your life, people that don't have to feel like that. 00:15:15.360 --> 00:15:18.260 They're going to have to walk on eggshells to say something to you. 00:15:19.100 --> 00:15:23.070 And it doesn't mean that you need to invite everyone into giving you an opinion. 00:15:23.440 --> 00:15:24.740 In fact, that's terrible. 00:15:24.840 --> 00:15:29.180 That would be a terrible thing to do, like being a pastor and the position that I have in life. 00:15:29.180 --> 00:15:34.900 I can tell you if I said, everyone here give me your opinion, I could never get anything done right. 00:15:34.980 --> 00:15:38.780 That's just way too many opinions to hear from in order to do anything. 00:15:39.200 --> 00:15:42.260 In fact, my job is not to hear your opinions, right? 00:15:42.340 --> 00:15:47.310 It's to honor the Lord and encourage people to do that we can walk life together and glorifying Jesus. 00:15:47.580 --> 00:15:50.630 There's all kinds of different ways and opinions about how that should look. 00:15:50.800 --> 00:15:53.840 And if you've got one, I've got a delete on my email. 00:15:54.480 --> 00:15:54.480 Right. 00:15:54.480 --> 00:15:55.600 Like I just I'm kidding, I'm kidding. 00:15:55.940 --> 00:16:00.160 But you need to have certain people in your life. 00:16:02.220 --> 00:16:07.820 That fill the open door to speak truth to you, especially if they genuinely care about you. 00:16:08.560 --> 00:16:09.080 Wise people. 00:16:10.200 --> 00:16:13.900 If your life isn't surrounded by that, it's important to invite that in. 00:16:14.820 --> 00:16:20.260 In fact, for certain people in my life, not everyone, but I leave this question on the table for them. 00:16:21.200 --> 00:16:23.830 If you were me, what would you do differently? 00:16:25.060 --> 00:16:29.960 Because I realize even I can have blind spots and I want to honor the Lord with my life. 00:16:31.000 --> 00:16:35.600 And so to not people, to not make people feel uncomfortable, to approach me right. 00:16:36.500 --> 00:16:43.520 To not feel like I'm just going to get defensive or I could blow up and they need to be concerned, but they feel safe and being able to 00:16:43.520 --> 00:16:48.740 respond in that kind of an answer, especially when it deals with important decisions in life. 00:16:49.460 --> 00:16:56.580 I met a person recently about to make a business decision that's going to initially cost them about a quarter of $1 million to start, and it just so happened they 00:16:56.580 --> 00:16:57.190 were getting ready to start. 00:16:57.700 --> 00:17:04.880 There was someone who was an expert in that field that came to them and said, I'm available just to give you some counsel and 00:17:04.880 --> 00:17:07.160 some wisdom in this decision if you want. 00:17:07.160 --> 00:17:09.720 And I remember I asked this person, are you going to seek that out? 00:17:09.760 --> 00:17:10.420 I mean, that's incredible. 00:17:10.720 --> 00:17:12.079 Like people would beg for this. 00:17:12.079 --> 00:17:12.920 Are you going to talk to this person? 00:17:13.319 --> 00:17:16.210 And they said to me, no, I said, why? 00:17:16.400 --> 00:17:17.720 Why would you not do that? 00:17:17.839 --> 00:17:21.920 And their response was, they were afraid that this person would advise them not to do it. 00:17:22.460 --> 00:17:24.520 I'm like, you're an idiot, right? 00:17:24.520 --> 00:17:29.640 I'm like, even if they say no and you disagree with that, at least you listen to that kind of counsel. 00:17:30.000 --> 00:17:33.390 How important it is in your life to have that spoken to you. 00:17:34.000 --> 00:17:41.160 And when you see this kind of heart with Abraham in the story, he knows the significance of this decision and his desire 00:17:41.160 --> 00:17:42.660 is saying, grab my thigh. 00:17:42.680 --> 00:17:47.820 And although that's weird, it's speaking to the importance of this moment for the sake of his son. 00:17:47.940 --> 00:17:55.020 And then he even goes on further and it says in verse seven, he's speaking to Eleazar, who has some questions about about going and finding Isaac a 00:17:55.020 --> 00:17:55.460 mate. 00:17:55.460 --> 00:18:02.500 And Abraham responds this way, the Lord, the God of heaven, who took me from my father's house and from the land of my kindred, and who spoke to me and swore to 00:18:02.500 --> 00:18:04.540 me to your offspring, I will give this land. 00:18:04.580 --> 00:18:09.280 He will send his angel before you, and you shall take a wife for my son from there. 00:18:09.540 --> 00:18:13.900 And so he's saying, look, our heart has been for the Lord and all of this, and we will follow after the Lord. 00:18:13.900 --> 00:18:14.770 And God has been faithful. 00:18:15.440 --> 00:18:19.060 And I know this is a big ask, but we're trusting in the Lord in all of this. 00:18:19.140 --> 00:18:24.270 And so you see the genuineness of Abraham's heart for the well being of his son and future generations. 00:18:25.640 --> 00:18:27.820 I mean, that's the kind of heart and someone that you want to seek for. 00:18:27.860 --> 00:18:32.950 In fact, some may ask the question, why does he want to just make sure this young lady comes from his homeland? 00:18:33.400 --> 00:18:34.230 Why is that so important? 00:18:34.340 --> 00:18:36.570 Why can't he just pick a lady you know, in their backyard? 00:18:36.880 --> 00:18:41.040 Because I'm sure there's ladies around there that are eligible to be to marry. 00:18:41.040 --> 00:18:41.220 Right. 00:18:41.260 --> 00:18:45.730 And I think the reasons a couple and it's because Abraham wants to honor the Lord. 00:18:46.620 --> 00:18:53.650 If Abraham were to, find a lady in that area, it could create all sorts of complications of what God desires to do. 00:18:54.060 --> 00:19:01.270 One, it could lead into idol worship because there's all the people around them are worshiping false gods and 00:19:01.400 --> 00:19:05.130 having that temptation there and families intertwined, it could lead to idolatry. 00:19:06.060 --> 00:19:09.220 Two it's become obvious that God wants to do something new in this land. 00:19:09.980 --> 00:19:16.560 And so rather than confuse that, Abraham is saying, let's bring someone from the outside, because what God desires to do is new. 00:19:17.060 --> 00:19:22.140 And so he goes to where he's familiar, where he knows his son can lead his family in a godly way. 00:19:22.720 --> 00:19:27.280 And so Abraham's heart is very much thinking for the success of his family. 00:19:27.340 --> 00:19:32.660 And so then it tells us that the servant then moves on to accomplish this purpose, to find this young woman. 00:19:32.660 --> 00:19:37.200 It says, then the servant took ten of his master's camels and departed. 00:19:37.580 --> 00:19:44.900 And so when you think about this, he's taking these camels to load up this young lady's possessions and bring back, I mean, how many possessions 00:19:44.900 --> 00:19:48.060 you got to have as a young lady in order to fill up ten camels? 00:19:48.060 --> 00:19:49.760 She's got a lot of shoes, right? 00:19:49.840 --> 00:19:50.380 Like this. 00:19:50.480 --> 00:19:50.800 This. 00:19:50.920 --> 00:19:54.620 He takes ten camels and he departs, taking all sorts of choice gifts from his master. 00:19:55.160 --> 00:19:57.460 And he rose and went to Mesopotamia, to the city of Nahor. 00:19:58.060 --> 00:20:01.470 And he made the camels kneel down outside the city by the well of the water. 00:20:01.620 --> 00:20:05.080 At the time of the evening, the time when women go out to draw water. 00:20:05.100 --> 00:20:11.990 And he said, oh, Lord God of my master Abraham, please grant me success today and show steadfast love to my master Abraham. 00:20:12.400 --> 00:20:16.770 Behold, I'm standing by the spring of water, and the daughters of men of the city are coming out to draw water. 00:20:17.120 --> 00:20:21.740 Let the young woman to whom I shall say, please let down your jar, that I may drink. 00:20:22.200 --> 00:20:23.740 And who shall say, drink, and I will. 00:20:23.980 --> 00:20:24.960 I will water your camels. 00:20:25.480 --> 00:20:29.540 Let her be the one whom you have appointed for your servant Isaac. 00:20:29.800 --> 00:20:33.340 By this I shall know that you have shown steadfast love to my master. 00:20:34.260 --> 00:20:35.640 So not only do you see Abraham's care. 00:20:37.060 --> 00:20:42.300 But here in these verses we just read, you see the servant even praying for Isaac's well-being. 00:20:42.560 --> 00:20:45.450 And you know, his motivation can be a little bit more than just Isaac. 00:20:46.440 --> 00:20:48.760 But he's seeking the Lord for the benefit of Isaac. 00:20:49.000 --> 00:20:56.500 And then more than that, because this servant knows whoever Isaac chooses is going to become his new leader, and 00:20:56.500 --> 00:21:00.340 it's going to impact not only his family now, but also generations to come. 00:21:01.200 --> 00:21:04.260 And so he's very well vested in this because he knows this matters. 00:21:04.940 --> 00:21:06.220 Same is true in family relationship. 00:21:06.640 --> 00:21:08.310 Your child finds a spouse. 00:21:08.500 --> 00:21:12.060 I mean, you're talking reunions and vacations and generations. 00:21:12.700 --> 00:21:14.340 All that in between. 00:21:14.340 --> 00:21:19.200 That decision impacts the people around you and years to come. 00:21:20.040 --> 00:21:24.680 And so having the open door for opportunity to discuss is important. 00:21:25.540 --> 00:21:26.470 Getting others involved. 00:21:27.080 --> 00:21:34.780 You know, it may not be a popular idea, but it's interesting when you study cultures that have arranged marriages versus 00:21:34.780 --> 00:21:39.980 cultures that are that are categorized as choice based marriages, not to say arranged marriages. 00:21:40.240 --> 00:21:41.560 There aren't any choices in that. 00:21:41.700 --> 00:21:48.160 I think there are certainly choices with arranged marriages, but it tends to be the two ways that categorize arranged marriages choice based marriages. 00:21:48.360 --> 00:21:55.660 Do you know, in studying those that statistics say that arranged marriages are more than ten times more likely to 00:21:55.660 --> 00:21:58.160 endure than choice based marriages? 00:21:58.920 --> 00:22:02.980 And there could be all kinds of reasons for that culture could play a part of that. 00:22:03.360 --> 00:22:09.620 But I think it's important to recognize that in arranged marriages, there is more than one person involved in that decision. 00:22:10.680 --> 00:22:12.460 And there's wisdom to that. 00:22:13.360 --> 00:22:17.770 Even in American history, though, we've always been more of a choice based society. 00:22:19.660 --> 00:22:26.680 There was more of a time in our history when there was a young man interested in the young, young lady, that young man 00:22:26.680 --> 00:22:30.000 just couldn't go grab that young lady and take her wherever he wanted. 00:22:30.640 --> 00:22:34.890 He had to go meet the family first, and the family had to interact with him to give their approval. 00:22:35.580 --> 00:22:42.840 And if they were unsure about that interaction, then that interaction just lasted longer until they got to a place of certainty before they would give 00:22:42.840 --> 00:22:44.980 their permission to date their daughter. 00:22:45.740 --> 00:22:51.370 And so there was this way of engaging the family for the well-being of a young lady and that relationship. 00:22:52.660 --> 00:22:56.480 And I know for us sitting here, we might look at that and be like, well, that's kind of old man. 00:22:56.480 --> 00:22:57.860 You're like a stick in the mud, right? 00:22:57.860 --> 00:22:58.090 A little archaic. 00:22:58.500 --> 00:23:04.580 I would just argue that the way that we pursue dating today is not healthier. 00:23:04.580 --> 00:23:05.100 Right. 00:23:05.100 --> 00:23:09.540 Like now for young ladies, it's like swipe left, swipe right. 00:23:09.540 --> 00:23:12.280 And eventually when you swipe right to the right one, you set up a date. 00:23:12.520 --> 00:23:14.560 Who knows where you're going and how safe that's going to be. 00:23:14.560 --> 00:23:15.220 Good luck to you. 00:23:15.220 --> 00:23:17.080 Like, that's way better, right? 00:23:17.080 --> 00:23:20.650 I mean, like you think about how important this decision is. 00:23:21.380 --> 00:23:28.820 And with the heart of Abraham and Eleazar, you see the well being communicated, 00:23:28.840 --> 00:23:32.540 finding someone to speak into their lives to encourage them. 00:23:32.560 --> 00:23:34.960 And it's not to leave Rebecca in the lurch. 00:23:35.380 --> 00:23:36.740 Even Rebecca is involved. 00:23:36.760 --> 00:23:41.940 They bring, Eleazar the servant goes to Rebecca's family, talks to her family. 00:23:42.180 --> 00:23:46.060 Her family brings her over and asks her what she thinks about it. 00:23:46.060 --> 00:23:48.060 And in verse 57 it says this. 00:23:48.080 --> 00:23:50.060 They said, let us call the young woman and ask her. 00:23:50.960 --> 00:23:54.870 And they called Rebecca in verse eight and said to her, Will you go with this man? 00:23:55.420 --> 00:23:56.910 And she said, I will go. 00:23:57.460 --> 00:24:02.230 And so they went away, Rebecca, their sister and her nurse, and Abraham's servant, and his men. 00:24:02.560 --> 00:24:09.600 And they blessed Rebecca and said to her, our sister, may you become thousands of ten thousands, and may your offspring possess the gate of those 00:24:09.600 --> 00:24:10.800 who hate him. 00:24:11.620 --> 00:24:13.820 So even her family cares about her well-being. 00:24:13.880 --> 00:24:20.880 They bless her as she's leaving and Rebecca says she will go right, which many look at this verse and 00:24:20.880 --> 00:24:23.620 actually say, Rebecca is the second Abraham. 00:24:23.620 --> 00:24:29.750 She's the female Abraham because she responds in faith the way that Abraham did. 00:24:29.840 --> 00:24:36.240 Abraham was called by God to go to a foreign place outside of all the things he was familiar with, because he saw the faithful hand of the Lord. 00:24:36.360 --> 00:24:37.700 And so Rebecca is doing the same. 00:24:38.680 --> 00:24:40.880 She follows after the Lord. 00:24:41.040 --> 00:24:47.880 You know, when it comes to any relationship, there's always risk of getting hurt because we're sinful people. 00:24:48.400 --> 00:24:48.560 Right? 00:24:48.560 --> 00:24:53.690 But what's important is the foundation there that indicates things can move forward in a healthy way. 00:24:54.240 --> 00:25:01.460 You don't know the kind of person someone might be ten, 20 years from now, but you do want to see the kind of foundation that gives you something healthy to 00:25:01.460 --> 00:25:02.440 build upon. 00:25:03.740 --> 00:25:11.210 And so Rebecca, she sees that, and then she takes this step of faith, becoming like Abraham in that sense. 00:25:11.360 --> 00:25:18.860 And what Rebecca does, I would say, may even be of greater faith in Abraham, because in Rebecca's day, the way the customs were when 00:25:18.860 --> 00:25:24.280 a young lady was to when she got married, customarily she would stay near her family. 00:25:25.200 --> 00:25:32.560 And the reason is because of the laws during that day that if a young lady was not able to produce offspring, 00:25:33.080 --> 00:25:36.700 the laws during that time said that the young man could divorce. 00:25:36.980 --> 00:25:40.600 First that young lady because she could not produce a lineage for their family. 00:25:41.640 --> 00:25:47.160 And when that would happen to a young lady, she could become vulnerable to the society and being taken advantage of. 00:25:48.060 --> 00:25:51.390 And so for her to make the decision to move away from her family. 00:25:51.440 --> 00:25:58.460 And I'm not saying those customs are right or good or honoring to the Lord, but to move away from her family was an extreme trust in who 00:25:58.460 --> 00:25:59.250 God was. 00:26:00.400 --> 00:26:04.480 And so therefore, to make that kind of decision, a wise counsel is important. 00:26:06.180 --> 00:26:11.760 parents, can I just encourage you in a model of this, how important it is that you be praying for your children? 00:26:12.760 --> 00:26:19.840 And just like Abraham's concern in seeking after the Lord here, just like the servant's concern and praying for Isaac, how important it is for you to pray 00:26:19.840 --> 00:26:24.610 for your children, and not this kind of prayer where you're like God, they need help. 00:26:25.060 --> 00:26:26.940 Lord, give them a mate that's going to fix them, right? 00:26:26.940 --> 00:26:28.540 Like that's your job, right? 00:26:28.540 --> 00:26:30.380 That's your job to parent your children. 00:26:31.440 --> 00:26:35.080 but rather, God help them find someone to walk in unity to glorify you. 00:26:36.000 --> 00:26:36.300 Right. 00:26:37.020 --> 00:26:41.060 And that's a that's a beautiful way to be involved and invite them over. 00:26:41.300 --> 00:26:41.320 Right. 00:26:41.660 --> 00:26:49.120 Invite them over and get get to know point point number two in your notes then is this look for the servant hearted. 00:26:50.920 --> 00:26:52.460 Look for the servant hearted. 00:26:55.120 --> 00:27:02.400 when I say servant hearted, I don't just mean someone who does something nice every once in a while, I mean someone whose 00:27:02.400 --> 00:27:06.170 characteristic in their life is to put others before themselves. 00:27:07.040 --> 00:27:08.500 Someone who walks in life to. 00:27:08.720 --> 00:27:09.750 To seek to bless. 00:27:09.880 --> 00:27:11.500 Not to just get blessed, right. 00:27:12.260 --> 00:27:15.080 The demeanor of their life is to care for those around them. 00:27:15.920 --> 00:27:22.740 There are those that do good things just to get the pat on the back, to feel better about themselves, and they just do it every once in a while to kind of cover up all the bad. 00:27:22.760 --> 00:27:27.920 You know, they try to do the yin and the yang thing, but we're talking about someone with a genuine heart of serving. 00:27:28.980 --> 00:27:36.200 And you see this in Rebecca in verse 15, before the servant had finished speaking, he was praying, behold, Rebecca, who was born to Bethuel, 00:27:36.380 --> 00:27:42.720 the son of Milcah, the wife of Nahor, Abraham's brother came out with her water, her water jar on her shoulder. 00:27:42.940 --> 00:27:47.180 The young woman was very attractive in appearance, and a maiden whom no man had known. 00:27:47.180 --> 00:27:50.590 She went down to the spring and filled her jar and came up. 00:27:50.740 --> 00:27:55.270 Then the servant ran out to meet her and said, please give me a little water to drink from your jar. 00:27:55.520 --> 00:27:56.950 And she said, drink, my lord. 00:27:57.040 --> 00:28:00.510 And she quickly let down her jar upon her hand and gave him a drink. 00:28:00.700 --> 00:28:05.850 When she had finished giving him a drink, she said, I will draw water for your camels also until they have finished drinking. 00:28:06.440 --> 00:28:10.560 So she quickly emptied her jar into the trough and ran again to the well to draw water. 00:28:10.680 --> 00:28:13.020 And she drew for all his camels. 00:28:13.960 --> 00:28:15.400 And this is what a servant heart. 00:28:15.400 --> 00:28:16.420 She doesn't know this person. 00:28:16.420 --> 00:28:19.580 This person is a stranger to her, and yet she cares for him. 00:28:19.580 --> 00:28:23.940 I looked up, what is the average camel drink when it's thirsty, right? 00:28:23.960 --> 00:28:31.000 Do you know, according to like, every Google article that popped up in front of me, it's somewhere between 20 to 00:28:31.000 --> 00:28:32.260 30 gallons. 00:28:33.000 --> 00:28:34.740 20 to 30 gallons. 00:28:34.780 --> 00:28:39.260 That would have been like, I'm here for one camel, like I care for you. 00:28:39.260 --> 00:28:40.040 One camel deep. 00:28:40.040 --> 00:28:43.080 That's a this girl doesn't even know them. 00:28:43.080 --> 00:28:47.550 And she's watering not only the people, but also ten camels. 00:28:47.880 --> 00:28:49.640 And she's not in this to get anything. 00:28:49.640 --> 00:28:51.420 She has no idea what they might offer to her. 00:28:51.660 --> 00:28:51.660 What? 00:28:51.660 --> 00:28:53.580 She finds a bracelet and a nose ring here in a minute. 00:28:53.800 --> 00:28:54.320 But. 00:28:54.940 --> 00:28:55.740 But she just. 00:28:55.800 --> 00:29:01.860 She has the genuine heart of a servant interested in the well-being of others. 00:29:01.950 --> 00:29:06.020 Do you know this is exactly what Jesus communicated for his followers? 00:29:06.720 --> 00:29:12.340 Have this mind in you, which is also in Christ Jesus, who became the form of a servant in Philippians chapter two, verse five. 00:29:13.740 --> 00:29:19.420 Jesus and the night he was betrayed, I would man, on the night I am betrayed, I would sulk and tell everyone my petty story. 00:29:20.080 --> 00:29:20.860 Jesus didn't. 00:29:21.660 --> 00:29:23.440 Jesus loved his own until the end. 00:29:23.460 --> 00:29:29.940 His mind was always on blessing others to the point that when Jesus is about to die, he washes the feet of his disciples. 00:29:30.400 --> 00:29:34.740 The position of the servant of servants in the home was the one who washed the feet. 00:29:35.520 --> 00:29:36.620 And Jesus took time. 00:29:36.620 --> 00:29:40.340 In the night he was being betrayed to wash the feet of his disciples and not just the disciples. 00:29:40.700 --> 00:29:42.600 He washed Judas's feet. 00:29:44.880 --> 00:29:51.920 You know, I often say it's in John 13, but I often say like, God is more interested in his people taking 00:29:51.920 --> 00:29:53.660 towels rather than titles. 00:29:54.420 --> 00:29:55.540 Titles come and go. 00:29:55.800 --> 00:30:02.840 If you find someone that's just so into their position, their authority, their title, what they have, rather than how God can use them 00:30:02.840 --> 00:30:03.450 to bless. 00:30:03.960 --> 00:30:05.240 That's all kinds of warning signs. 00:30:06.780 --> 00:30:09.040 But God's interested in the heart of a servant. 00:30:09.800 --> 00:30:11.900 Now the question is, how do you find someone like that? 00:30:12.460 --> 00:30:17.420 Because when you start to date someone, they're always putting their best foot forward because they're there to impress you. 00:30:17.880 --> 00:30:20.240 They're there to get something from you, right? 00:30:20.240 --> 00:30:22.460 Like they want you to think the best of them. 00:30:22.480 --> 00:30:25.280 So how do you find that person? 00:30:25.280 --> 00:30:26.540 Well, I think the answer is easy. 00:30:27.660 --> 00:30:30.760 See how they treat people in which they have nothing to gain from. 00:30:32.420 --> 00:30:34.880 How do they treat the most unpopular person in the circle? 00:30:35.460 --> 00:30:37.170 How do they respond when they get upset? 00:30:37.980 --> 00:30:39.580 How do they treat the people around them? 00:30:39.940 --> 00:30:44.200 How do they react to the grocery store clerk and the waiter or waitress that serves them? 00:30:44.640 --> 00:30:46.230 How do they treat their own mother and their grandmother? 00:30:48.000 --> 00:30:50.000 How do they treat the people around them? 00:30:50.840 --> 00:30:57.840 Because while they're putting their best foot forward while they're dating you, I can promise you in about a year or two, the way they treat them will be exactly the way 00:30:57.840 --> 00:30:58.360 they treat you. 00:31:00.620 --> 00:31:02.140 You want to find someone with a servant heart. 00:31:03.560 --> 00:31:07.410 See how they treat someone that they have nothing to gain from. 00:31:08.520 --> 00:31:12.260 And this is exactly what Rebecca is doing in this story. 00:31:13.580 --> 00:31:13.940 She's. 00:31:14.180 --> 00:31:15.340 She's laying down her life. 00:31:15.340 --> 00:31:19.490 If you run into someone that is always interested in winning you to their side. 00:31:20.540 --> 00:31:21.630 They've always got problems. 00:31:21.860 --> 00:31:23.320 But it's always those people. 00:31:23.600 --> 00:31:25.700 Their life is just a revolving cul de sac. 00:31:25.980 --> 00:31:27.660 They never have this position of humility. 00:31:27.800 --> 00:31:28.660 They've never apologized. 00:31:29.100 --> 00:31:31.680 And everything's always level ten problem. 00:31:32.260 --> 00:31:33.820 And they can change. 00:31:33.820 --> 00:31:35.160 They certainly can change. 00:31:35.620 --> 00:31:39.940 But don't enter in that relationship with the wishful thinking that they're going to all of a sudden because you're there. 00:31:40.460 --> 00:31:42.300 Let them change first, right? 00:31:43.580 --> 00:31:45.080 And before you attach your heart. 00:31:47.730 --> 00:31:49.040 well, I should just end this point. 00:31:49.040 --> 00:31:49.860 Look for the servant heart. 00:31:49.900 --> 00:31:50.480 There we go. 00:31:50.580 --> 00:31:52.960 I can go on forever, but let's just stop there. 00:31:53.020 --> 00:31:53.950 Look for the servant heart. 00:31:54.940 --> 00:31:56.030 And you see this, Rebecca. 00:31:56.100 --> 00:31:57.160 And then point number three. 00:31:57.160 --> 00:31:58.880 Then look for pure devotion. 00:31:59.960 --> 00:32:03.820 You see this in a couple of ways at the in the life of Rebecca here and here. 00:32:03.820 --> 00:32:08.170 In the end, we'll look at a verse with Isaac, but look for pure devotion. 00:32:08.860 --> 00:32:13.000 And one of the ways you see this in Rebecca, it tells you in verse 16. 00:32:13.140 --> 00:32:17.480 she was a woman, was very attractive in appearance, and a maiden who had known no man. 00:32:17.920 --> 00:32:21.280 The way that they identify her pure devotion is through her virginity. 00:32:22.880 --> 00:32:30.120 She has taken the kind of steps in life where she has revered her future spouse by remaining a virgin, which 00:32:30.120 --> 00:32:33.700 communicates really devotion and trust to her future spouse. 00:32:34.480 --> 00:32:39.670 And she has a desire to give herself to that person that the Lord has for her. 00:32:40.180 --> 00:32:43.740 And so this pure devotion is demonstrated this way. 00:32:43.780 --> 00:32:47.460 And I know in our culture, the idea of virginity is not a popular thing. 00:32:47.540 --> 00:32:54.560 But I can I tell you, the greatest person to ever live who was doing pretty good right now lived a life of a virgin from beginning to 00:32:54.560 --> 00:32:54.840 end. 00:32:54.900 --> 00:32:55.690 His name is Jesus. 00:32:56.500 --> 00:33:02.100 So it's impossible to live that lifestyle and completely have a fulfilled life. 00:33:02.220 --> 00:33:05.580 And that's certainly what Jesus demonstrated in his own life. 00:33:05.820 --> 00:33:07.440 But here's the reason I want to bring this up. 00:33:07.440 --> 00:33:14.820 I'm not bringing this up to guilt, anyone to talk about your past or anything like that, but I want you to see in Scripture how important 00:33:14.820 --> 00:33:17.620 your body is in connection to your soul. 00:33:18.840 --> 00:33:19.710 And the Bible is very clear. 00:33:19.800 --> 00:33:24.300 It describes those things as independent from or unique to one another. 00:33:24.880 --> 00:33:32.780 But also it's intertwined with each other, meaning what you do with your body impacts 00:33:32.780 --> 00:33:33.800 your soul. 00:33:34.500 --> 00:33:36.100 Those things aren't unrelated. 00:33:36.400 --> 00:33:38.000 You can't separate them. 00:33:38.080 --> 00:33:45.140 And in fact, there are books of the Bible written about that where there were certain religions that came along that try to teach that saying, there's the spiritual side of you, there's this physical 00:33:45.140 --> 00:33:45.820 side of you. 00:33:45.860 --> 00:33:47.420 It's Gnosticism. 00:33:47.420 --> 00:33:48.960 first John is written against that. 00:33:49.480 --> 00:33:52.640 And they would say, it doesn't matter what you do with your body because, well, you have the spiritual side. 00:33:52.720 --> 00:33:58.100 So you honor God with your spiritual side and you do what you want with your body because, well, it's your body and whatever makes you happy. 00:33:58.100 --> 00:34:01.030 That's what you need to pursue, as long as it doesn't hurt anyone else. 00:34:01.800 --> 00:34:03.740 And can I just tell you that's not biblical at all? 00:34:04.820 --> 00:34:08.560 When God created everything, everything he created belongs to him, including you. 00:34:09.139 --> 00:34:16.280 And everything created gives you an opportunity to honor the Lord in giving it back, as God has given all of himself for 00:34:16.280 --> 00:34:16.620 you. 00:34:16.639 --> 00:34:20.060 So you have the opportunity to show your love for the Lord by giving him all of yourself in return. 00:34:20.340 --> 00:34:25.800 And that includes everything of who you are, your gifts, your talents, your body, your resources, all of that. 00:34:25.840 --> 00:34:28.070 You can honor the Lord in the way that you use it. 00:34:28.480 --> 00:34:32.480 In fact, Paul writes in first Corinthians chapter six, he says this. 00:34:32.719 --> 00:34:35.330 Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ himself? 00:34:36.219 --> 00:34:39.889 Shall I then take the members of Christ and unite them with a prostitute? 00:34:40.100 --> 00:34:41.020 Never. 00:34:41.159 --> 00:34:45.360 Do you not know that he who unites himself with a prostitute is one with her in body? 00:34:45.960 --> 00:34:47.739 For it is said, the two will become one flesh. 00:34:48.159 --> 00:34:50.550 Your body belongs to the Lord. 00:34:51.199 --> 00:34:51.239 So? 00:34:51.380 --> 00:34:58.400 So he's saying this passage, look, what you do physically is connected to your life spiritually, and you can scar that 00:34:58.400 --> 00:35:00.280 like there's damage. 00:35:00.280 --> 00:35:04.240 It doesn't mean it's irredeemable or God doesn't care. 00:35:04.240 --> 00:35:08.770 The grace of God can't be made known, but it's to be mindful of those decisions that it does impact. 00:35:09.920 --> 00:35:17.180 In fact, if you look at the digital notes today in the sermon, if you download our app and you click on sermon notes, I had a link to a resource on the digital 00:35:17.180 --> 00:35:17.530 app. 00:35:17.540 --> 00:35:25.680 It's not in your printed bulletin on the digital app about an article that was written by a secular author, articles published 00:35:25.680 --> 00:35:27.480 on the Gospel Coalition. 00:35:27.480 --> 00:35:31.280 It's called Sex Liberation has Failed Women and the author. 00:35:31.840 --> 00:35:31.900 This. 00:35:32.020 --> 00:35:36.200 This article is commenting on a book written by a secular author, not even a Christian. 00:35:36.520 --> 00:35:38.640 And the book is called Case Against the Sexual Revolution. 00:35:39.740 --> 00:35:46.720 And this lady talks about the impact that the sexual revolution has had on the state of women, where women think it's liberating. 00:35:47.000 --> 00:35:52.050 But actually it's not only become destructive for them, but it's impacted children and generations. 00:35:52.300 --> 00:35:58.060 And then she gets to the conclusion, having done all this research and study, she gets to the conclusion, what's the healthiest thing that women can do? 00:35:58.160 --> 00:35:59.890 And she said, people aren't going to like my answer. 00:36:00.160 --> 00:36:00.740 It's clunky. 00:36:00.740 --> 00:36:03.480 It's going to sound archaic, but it's monogamous marriage. 00:36:03.620 --> 00:36:07.350 And she, not even a Christian, lays out the framework of why that's important. 00:36:07.460 --> 00:36:14.580 I will tell you, if you read the article, it's a little bit shocking in some of the ways this lady speaks, because she's not coming from a Christian perspective, but 00:36:14.580 --> 00:36:17.950 it's very eye opening that even the secular world acknowledges this. 00:36:18.920 --> 00:36:20.820 What you do physically impacts you spiritually. 00:36:20.860 --> 00:36:23.590 You even see this as a church and I got to go faster. 00:36:23.960 --> 00:36:31.260 But let me just say this when we worship music, we sing verbally 00:36:31.260 --> 00:36:33.140 to connect our souls spiritually. 00:36:33.400 --> 00:36:40.780 When we want to hear from God, you open the Word of God to look at the words of God right when you partake in communion 00:36:40.780 --> 00:36:41.600 or baptism. 00:36:41.600 --> 00:36:46.160 They're all physical things that we do that connect our soul to worship. 00:36:46.360 --> 00:36:50.810 And even the last part of this verse, verse, verse 18, it says flee from sexual immorality. 00:36:51.180 --> 00:36:55.730 All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually sins against their own body. 00:36:55.760 --> 00:37:00.160 Do you not know that your bodies are the temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? 00:37:00.180 --> 00:37:00.940 You are not your own. 00:37:00.940 --> 00:37:01.770 You were bought with a price. 00:37:01.860 --> 00:37:02.900 Glorify God with your bodies. 00:37:02.940 --> 00:37:03.730 Let me tell you what this is saying. 00:37:04.560 --> 00:37:11.940 When God told Moses how to build the tabernacle, very specific in particular, and how God wanted to meet with his people and 00:37:11.940 --> 00:37:19.020 everything in that tabernacle or that temple God Israel only ever had one temple, but everything in it demonstrates what Christ would ultimately 00:37:19.020 --> 00:37:20.070 fulfill. 00:37:20.760 --> 00:37:23.160 Now, in this world, now, today, let me say it like this. 00:37:23.320 --> 00:37:28.020 Today we no longer go to a physical temple because when Jesus died on the cross, the veil was torn. 00:37:28.060 --> 00:37:31.280 The Spirit of God no longer dwells in the temple, but rather you have become the temple. 00:37:31.960 --> 00:37:38.700 You think how important it was in the Old Testament for that temple, the details of that temple to be set up, and the way God desires to meet with him. 00:37:39.220 --> 00:37:40.160 The same is true for your body. 00:37:41.620 --> 00:37:42.740 Connecting to the Lord. 00:37:43.540 --> 00:37:48.440 Now, I'm not telling you all this to make you feel guilty or bad about decisions, but. 00:37:48.580 --> 00:37:52.050 But rather you can choose this day how to respond. 00:37:52.520 --> 00:37:55.620 I mean, the grace of God is new every morning for your life. 00:37:55.620 --> 00:38:02.660 And also, not only does it give you the platform to say, Lord, I love you and I'm giving my life to you, but it's also saying, Lord, if you've got a future mate for me, 00:38:02.920 --> 00:38:10.240 I get the opportunity now to honour that relationship through purity, through devotion and trust is essential for the health of relationships. 00:38:11.560 --> 00:38:13.640 And if you don't have trust, it's difficult to build. 00:38:13.640 --> 00:38:18.840 So establishing that trust and any time you have conflict in relationship, it wants to tear from that trust. 00:38:18.880 --> 00:38:21.760 And so it's important to drive to it for the sake of one another. 00:38:22.140 --> 00:38:22.930 And point number three. 00:38:23.200 --> 00:38:23.600 Move on. 00:38:25.020 --> 00:38:25.540 Point number three. 00:38:26.030 --> 00:38:27.370 Oh, no, I already gave you that point. 00:38:27.780 --> 00:38:28.900 Point number three is look for devotion. 00:38:28.900 --> 00:38:29.500 That's good. 00:38:29.500 --> 00:38:30.340 We're getting to the end. 00:38:30.520 --> 00:38:36.140 I thought I was going to run out of time, body and soul being connected. 00:38:37.340 --> 00:38:40.800 But here in the end, you see how Isaac responds. 00:38:40.800 --> 00:38:41.560 Verse 62. 00:38:41.620 --> 00:38:43.430 Now Isaac had returned from burial. 00:38:43.920 --> 00:38:49.100 Hey, Roy, I think it says it definitely says that and was dwelling in the negeb. 00:38:49.240 --> 00:38:55.760 And Isaac went out to meditate in the field toward evening, and he lifted up his eyes and saw, behold, there were camels coming. 00:38:55.880 --> 00:39:00.000 And Rebecca lifted up her eyes, and when she saw Isaac, she dismounted from the camel. 00:39:00.000 --> 00:39:03.860 Pause right there and say, real quick, you think how beautiful this is. 00:39:04.660 --> 00:39:11.720 The first time she lays her eyes on her future husband, and he's praying before the Lord, acknowledging 00:39:11.720 --> 00:39:17.200 that not only does he have authority in his in his home, but he's also under authority. 00:39:18.200 --> 00:39:21.820 He knows he's accountable in what he does and especially how he treats his spouse. 00:39:22.620 --> 00:39:29.680 Pure devotion Rebecca sees and she dismounted from the camel in verse 65 and said to the servant, who 00:39:29.680 --> 00:39:31.640 is the man walking in the field to meet us? 00:39:31.640 --> 00:39:33.320 And the servant said, it is my master. 00:39:33.520 --> 00:39:35.800 So she took her veil and covered herself. 00:39:36.120 --> 00:39:38.890 And the servant told Isaac all the things that he had done. 00:39:39.000 --> 00:39:44.760 And then Isaac brought her into the tent of Sarah, his mother, and took Rebecca, and she became his wife, and he loved her. 00:39:44.860 --> 00:39:48.980 So Isaac was comforted after his mother's death. 00:39:48.980 --> 00:39:52.860 And here you see this young lady observing her customs and the way she chooses to honor her relationship. 00:39:53.140 --> 00:39:53.200 Right. 00:39:53.280 --> 00:39:58.640 She covers herself and symbolic of, this wedding that's about to take place. 00:39:59.200 --> 00:40:01.450 And then they get to enjoy that relationship together. 00:40:02.480 --> 00:40:04.260 And she has prepared herself for this. 00:40:05.120 --> 00:40:06.900 And now she has the beauty of walking in this. 00:40:06.900 --> 00:40:10.990 Both of them have prepared themselves for this, and now they have the beautiful privilege of walking. 00:40:11.240 --> 00:40:18.260 And it's not perfect, but they have established a platform of health for that relationship to move forward in a beautiful way. 00:40:19.120 --> 00:40:26.240 Now, guys, I know when you talk about relationships like this, especially dealing with marriage, that we come into a 00:40:26.240 --> 00:40:31.140 message with all sorts of battle scars, sometimes things that we wish had gone different, that didn't. 00:40:31.680 --> 00:40:33.650 Things that we wish that we could change but we can't. 00:40:35.440 --> 00:40:37.480 we have relationships aren't. 00:40:37.540 --> 00:40:38.050 They're not easy. 00:40:39.340 --> 00:40:39.440 Right. 00:40:39.520 --> 00:40:46.590 And so if you're acknowledging that, if you say to yourself, look, I've messed up, I haven't done this in my own life, I feel terrible. 00:40:46.940 --> 00:40:47.670 What can I do? 00:40:48.140 --> 00:40:50.060 I want you to know that's not where God wants you to be. 00:40:51.060 --> 00:40:52.350 God is for you. 00:40:52.460 --> 00:40:54.220 God desires to transform your life. 00:40:54.500 --> 00:40:56.140 God desires to renew your heart. 00:40:56.320 --> 00:40:57.400 God wants you to walk with him. 00:40:58.100 --> 00:41:01.020 Jesus died on the cross for your sins so you could experience that newness. 00:41:01.280 --> 00:41:01.910 So what do you do? 00:41:02.000 --> 00:41:02.860 How do you do that? 00:41:03.940 --> 00:41:07.000 And how do you right now make the decision to move forward in a healthy way? 00:41:07.060 --> 00:41:09.930 You can't you can't undo the past, but you can right now. 00:41:10.980 --> 00:41:13.000 Right now, choose to take that healthy step forward. 00:41:13.000 --> 00:41:13.860 How do you do that? 00:41:14.860 --> 00:41:16.410 What can I tell you the answer very easily. 00:41:18.040 --> 00:41:19.360 Is to dive deeper into Jesus. 00:41:21.280 --> 00:41:24.180 To move into Jesus because of God's heart for you. 00:41:24.780 --> 00:41:28.440 And you see, that is communicated beautifully in Ephesians five. 00:41:28.440 --> 00:41:29.980 And this last verse will be done. 00:41:30.620 --> 00:41:34.440 But Ephesians five, it says, as husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church. 00:41:34.800 --> 00:41:36.600 And you might say, husband, okay, what does that look like? 00:41:36.620 --> 00:41:37.220 And it's this. 00:41:38.000 --> 00:41:45.020 And he gave himself up for her that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so 00:41:45.020 --> 00:41:52.820 that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle, or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. 00:41:53.360 --> 00:41:56.060 And by the way, this answer works for single people too. 00:41:56.120 --> 00:41:58.120 If you remain single your entire life, this is. 00:41:58.320 --> 00:41:59.740 This is the answer for all of us. 00:42:00.600 --> 00:42:01.420 But here's what he's saying. 00:42:02.040 --> 00:42:03.300 Husbands, love your wives like this. 00:42:03.300 --> 00:42:03.820 And what is? 00:42:03.820 --> 00:42:04.520 What does that look like? 00:42:04.540 --> 00:42:05.680 How am I to love my wife? 00:42:06.140 --> 00:42:14.020 He doesn't say love your wife when she makes herself lovable, but rather what he says is love 00:42:14.020 --> 00:42:16.220 your wife unconditionally, sacrificially. 00:42:16.780 --> 00:42:22.960 Because when you love her that way, it transforms her more and more into the image that he desires. 00:42:23.900 --> 00:42:24.910 This is what is saying about you and Jesus. 00:42:25.440 --> 00:42:26.520 Jesus knows you're not perfect. 00:42:27.380 --> 00:42:29.410 That's why his grace and love is made new to you every morning. 00:42:30.500 --> 00:42:37.560 And when you come to him in that place, his love transforms your life and it molds you every time you're coming to 00:42:37.560 --> 00:42:37.880 the Lord. 00:42:37.900 --> 00:42:41.380 It transforms your life as you continue to surrender all that you are to him. 00:42:41.460 --> 00:42:48.820 And the more you're surrendered and walking in Jesus every day, you grow in that grace and he's washing you and renewing you and transforming 00:42:48.820 --> 00:42:50.840 your life in him. 00:42:51.080 --> 00:42:54.860 That's why I say that the answer is, God knows you're not perfect, but lean into that. 00:42:54.930 --> 00:42:56.250 Husbands, the way you love your wife. 00:42:56.320 --> 00:42:57.430 You don't wait for her to be more lovable. 00:42:58.320 --> 00:43:00.220 Your love is what transforms her. 00:43:00.800 --> 00:43:07.320 And the more you use that love to lavish upon her, it gives her the opportunity to thrive in that kind of environment. 00:43:07.340 --> 00:43:10.720 By the way, ladies, it's the same in for you as well. 00:43:10.740 --> 00:43:13.590 It talks about respect more in this passage for women, but it's the same. 00:43:14.440 --> 00:43:16.680 And so it becomes this beautiful, beautiful place for us. 00:43:16.680 --> 00:43:20.540 When you think about your life and you say, man, I have messed up, I'm not where I should be. 00:43:20.580 --> 00:43:22.620 I haven't done what I should have done, man. 00:43:22.620 --> 00:43:25.080 Lord knows that's what he died for. 00:43:26.000 --> 00:43:28.120 And also he's got incredible plans for your life. 00:43:29.180 --> 00:43:31.180 But the answer is, will you surrender to him? 00:43:31.960 --> 00:43:35.120 And in so doing, Jesus does his beautiful work in you.